Monday, 6 July 2009

Rustlers Flame Grilled BBQ Rib

Remember this? Well, I didn't die from it, and what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, right?

It clearly also makes you a lot dumber, because when the Mancreature and I saw this Rustlers Flame Grilled BBQ Rib on sale at the Sainsbury's for 92p last week, we reached out and put one in our basket.

And it sat in the darkened confines of the fridge for a week, til we came back from Manchester yesterday morn with nary a bite to eat. So we reached for the old microwave burger.

Picture of the burger on the packaging - with lettuce

It says 'Use by 18 Jul' on the box but I'm pretty sure that's only a recommendation, not a rule. Notice the succulent green lettuce nestling under the juicy pork patty in the picture?

Actual burger, out of its box - no lettuce :(

This is what it actually looked like, out of it's plastic preservation chamber. No shiny meatwedge, no crisp lettuce.

BBQ Sauce

But hey, that's all fine, because there's a packet of BBQ sauce nestled under the bun! The uncooked burger was fridge-cold and had a sort of grey colour to it, which the makers had probably tried to disguise by giving it black 'grill marks'.

Unnuked burger

Suspicious black spots on the bun

Oh, and there were also these strange black bits all over the inside of the bun, I know not what they were. 'Grill marks' again, perhaps?

Nuked burger, with shiny sauce

The Mancreature put his manly talents to good use by chucking the whole shebang into the microwave and nuking it...2 minutes or so. I think that's what the instructions say. He then ripped apart the bag o' BBQ sauce with his strong arms and slathered it all over the processed pork wedge, before slicing the whole thing into half.

Sharing is caring, indeed.

Open your mouth for the choo-choo meat train!


And then I ate it. I ate it good. I showed it who's boss and destroyed the thing like I hadn't eaten for about 20 hours! Which I hadn't.

Bleeding innards

And the verdict? You know how, sometimes, when you're really hungry, the first thing you get to eat will taste really really good, because you've been so hungry that you've nearly forgotten what food tasted like? Well, it wasn't like that with this burger. I felt quite ashamed of myself, like I was back in churchie school and had done something bad. During chapel time. I wanted to go wash myself after eating this burger. I had a biscuit instead.