No Shit, Sherlock

What the hell is going on with this? Hyde Park makes me want to kick things very hard. This is one of the reasons I've lost faith in the human race.

But at least I've got a cape and can go around being a masked avenger!

And it's reversible! One side for when I'm feeling like a drug-addicted Victorian detective, and the other for when I'm feeling all sweetness and light. Which is never.
Having a sewing machine is awesome.

Girls Can Do Anything

Anyone remember these?

Girl's World - Fashion Designer!

If you were a girl growing up in the '80s then you very well might recognise that sickly shade of pink - reserved for the manufacture of every toy marketed at girls between 2 - 14 years old.
I had one but my mum threw it out when we moved - that's why I live a good 24 hours flight away from them now (am I kidding? Who knows?)

Inside view

But it's alright, I found one - with all parts included - in a second-hand shop last year, so all's well with the world these days. Strangely enough, the shop decided that the box needed one of these warnings.

Of course it's suitable for children! It's called "Girl's World". It's a kids toy...for kids! It even has that cute little Tomy logo in the corner with the happy children! And it's not even like there's tiny pieces in it that kids can choke on. Unless you knew a kid with a monstrously wide mouth - maybe an 8 year old Steven Tyler?

Sexy lady

Back of lady

When you turn the front bits over, you'll see textures on the back pf the plates. Once you've traced the outline of the outfit, you can then fill it in with patterns and textures. Not just a pretty face.

Mine even came with already coloured-in drawings from the little girl who owned it before me. She seems to have given them all names and personalities too.

Serina SmartiePants - Bahahahaah, my favourite

This one's my favourite picture coz it looks like she has hyper-trichosis. It's actually a picture on the side of the box, so I'm guessing it wasn't drawn by a kid. What the fuck's going on? Maybe the product designer had a crush on Jojo the Wolfboy?

All the single ladies...

Now I wanna go get awesome vintage fabric and make 70's tennis outfits. Instead, I made a little owlie.
This little guy was meant to go into the store, maybe as a pincushion, but I dunno if I can bear to part with him. And I don't like the thought of some random sticking pins into him. I might give it away to someone I know will treat him well.
Speaking of the store, I was getting all depressed coz no one had bought anything for over a week, and no one even seemed to be looking at any of our stuff, then I logged on yesterday morning and saw that I had sold two aprons overnight!
The buyers will receive their aprons in a very nicely wrapped up package. Coz I like wrapping things up.

And lastly - are those weeds growing in my terrarium? Can someone with more plant knowledge than me please let me know? I was excited when I saw little green things sprouting, but now that they're bigger some of them look suspiciously similar to those weedy things you see in cracks on the street. I dunno what to do! If they look like they're going all Triffid-style in the mossararium I might pull them out.

Ginger Biscuits

Made more edibles...and this time, they don't look quite so turdy. Unless yours come out looking light brown with ginger flecks in it. I dunno, I don't inspect others' poo that often.

Ginger Biscuits
2 cups plain flour
150g unsalted butter
1 1/2 cups sugar
200g crystallised ginger
2 eggs
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
chocolate bits (optional)

*If your ginger comes in big chunks, make sure you chop them up into itty-bitty bits before mixing them in as you don't want people choking on chunks of fiery ginger death.

It's a pretty simple thing to make, just mix the flour and cinnamon and ginger together -and try to make sure the top of your cinnamon jar doesn't fall open and deposit a million grams of cinnamon into your flour, like mine did. Anyway, then you mix the sugar and butter together till it's creamy, and what I did was to add half the dry mixture into the butter mixture before adding the eggy-weggys, then I added the other half of the dry mixture in.

Then you mix everything together and spoon portions onto baking trays and bake them for between 10 - 15 mins. I think I did mine for 12 mins. I also added some bits of chilli chocolate to the last batch I made. Because of all the extra cinnamon, I was worried that they would come out too gross, but the biscuits disappeared into greedy stomachs as soon as they came out of the oven, which I guess is a good sign. They ended up being pretty spicy (probably coz of all the extra cinnamon) so it might be a good winter-time biccy.

Success!

Why? Because I just sold my first item on Etsy!

And the lucky buyer gets it in this cute little package. Coz I'm nice...this time.

Hatsy

I've just uploaded my first item into the Bobbie and Lola Etsy store. It's this lil beanie here...So if you know anyone who needs to keep their head warm...you know where to go. There'll be more exciting things up soon (let's face it, a beanie isn't that exciting, is it?). Possibly even crocheted poopy pincushions.
I can't take any photos now to upload onto Etsy coz my lazy-arse housemate is 'sick' and asleep and I lent him my camera yesterday and waking him up is impossible so I won't be able to get it till he wakes up at about 5pm, by which time the light has totally disappeared and I'll have to take photos indoors, probably under the fluoro in the kitchen. Gross...

Pooping Crochet

I got poo on my mind. Poo, and moss. But mainly poo. I think I just like saying it. It just rolls off the tongue so easily. Go on...say it -poooooooo...

So I made one. Well, actually, I've made more than one (of course!) but I've only made one so far that doesn't stink up a room and isn't messy. Behold the crocheted poop!It's really easy to make, single crochet all around, and if you've been crocheting for awhile, you'll be able to make it without any instructions. If you're a beginner and need to be told how to shit, then simply google it. The interweb is full of crap. Quite literally.

And while we're talking about nastiness, I thought I'd throw in some pictures of my bruises for you too. I acquired these while cycling down Victoria Road about 4 days before I left Sydney. A parting present, perhaps? I actually burst into tears after I got up, mainly because I was a little shocked at having found myself on the ground, just before unnnecessarily-large 4-wheel-drives started zooming past.

Anyway, besides making poo, I've been surprisingly productive this past week. Not having a job is great! It allows me to do all the things I never could while I was working. Not that having to sit in reception and check in grumpy Euro-touros every couple of hours was a particularly exhausting job.

I started and finished this bonnet, which I got from a Patons booklet from the op-shop. The pattern was actually for a doll's bonnet, but dolls are creepy and I don't intend on buying them, much less making clothes for them. So I simply used a bigger hook and made it human size.
(I look fairly sheepish in the photo because I just realised I looked like a giant baby. That's enough to make anyone look sheepish. Or maybe that's just how I look in all my photos anyway.)

I've also finished a couple more aprons, and two skirts made from big old-lady scarfs. These, and the bonnet, are going into the Etsy store that Googy and I have set up. And also some ear stretchers. I've only made three for now coz I ran out of Fimo. I'll include a link for the store at the side or something. There's nothing in it now anyway. Except for a picture of Nugget. Nugget is hot. It's our mascot.
And just for my own viewing pleasure, I've made a little moss terrarium. A mossarium? I found the perfect jar for it in one of the op-shops in Camberwell on Sunday, then dragged the poor, sick boy to the park with me so I could scoop up some lovely green moss.
Another op-shop find was the tiny little Ful-Vue camera - looks like a half-sized version of a medium format twin-lens reflex...but so cute and so little. It's supposed to take 620 film, so I'm gonna try and look for some medium format film and modify it/ squeeze it in.
Small things are awesome.

Pile of Poo (Also Known As Cookies)

I'm not dead. Yet. I've simply been too much of a lazy bastard to post much. Blame the humidity. It's easy to blame the humidity for everything. Humidity can't do much about it except...be more humid. Which makes me uncomfortable. And then I blame it again. And it becomes a vicious cycle. Anyway, I'm now back in London, feeling surprisingly motivated to do...stuff. Stuff like, baking and sewing. Anything as long as it's not 'proper' work.

On Monday, the day we got home, I had the strongest craving for chocolate chip cookies as I was napping (does it still count as 'napping' if you've slept for 10 hours straight?). The craving was strong enough that I actually googled some recipes and made up a batch of cookies yesterday.

I might have googled some recipes, but it doesn't mean that I actually followed any of them. That would have been too much work. It would also have entailed getting the right ingredients. Instead, I simply substituted what I had for the stuff I didn't have, mixed them together, put them in the oven and hoped they didn't come out disgusting (tastewise, not lookwise. Lookwise, they look like turds with undigested nuts in them).

Pile Of Poo-kies

2 cups flour (I'm guessing it was plain flour, it was in the jar that said 'FLOUR')
1/4 cup cocoa powder
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon (optional)
100g chocolate chips
100g hazelnuts
125g butter
3/4 cup sugar
2 tablespoons honey
2 eggs

Mix the flour, cocoa powder, cinnamon, chocolate chips and hazelnuts together in a bowl.
Mix the butter, sugar, honey and eggs together in another bowl.
Mix both bowls of stuff together.
Spoon them onto a baking tray and bake them for 10 - 15 minutes in a preheated oven at 180 degrees Celsius. I baked mine for 12 minutes.

They turned out pretty brownie-like, I might add a couple more eggs to the mixture next time and just try to make them as brownies. I thought they might be gross but they're surprisingly addictive. I ate four straight out of the oven. Usually I don't eat much of something once I've baked it. I just like the baking, not the eating.
You might also want to try making smaller cookies, as I found them intensely dense (indensely?). Even a tiny bite requires plenty of mouthwork. Not in a bad way, I guess. It was pretty tasty chewing the chocolatey goodness. They made me think of Nuttella, if Nutella was baked into a cookie-shaped object.

Yesterday was also a good day for another reason. A very very nice boy bought me a pretty, brand spanking new sewing machine! It's supposed to be an early birthday present which probably means I'm not entitled to another present on the proper day, but I don't really care anyway. This has been the best present for a while. I'm gonna rape it.